From joy and bubbly to darkness

– Now it will be a struggle, the hard way. I realized it right then and there.

Before the summer of 2022, Frida Ulfhed had a Pap smear at home and received the answer that she was infected with HPV. After a follow-up visit to the midwife, she was informed that she needed to have part of her cervix removed. During the procedure, the midwife became concerned that there were too many samples and decided to take more samples.

– A few days later, the receptionist called me when she picked up my 8-year-old son from school. She told me my test results had arrived and asked me if I could come there on Friday and bring someone for support.

He had a wife and mother as support

I stood there with my daughter and tried not to collapse. I realized I had cancer. I don't know how you managed to stay together in preschool and then at home. When I told my wife she completely broke down. Frida's mother and wife were there when she received the news that one of the samples had cancer.

– I knew that, but hearing it is something else. If there is a moment I cherish, it is this one. What's hard isn't the pain or the surgery or the physical stuff. It's the message, “You have cancer.” It sits so deep it hurts to think about it.

I had a very easy journey with cancer and I felt almost ashamed

In March 2023, Frida underwent surgery to remove her uterus, fallopian tubes and pelvic lymph nodes. When the tissues were examined a few weeks later, the surgeon said: “If you have champagne in the fridge, it's time to take it out.”

-You were high on life! Everything went very quickly and was relatively easy. I had a very easy journey with cancer and I was almost ashamed that it had been so easy for me. But I was also very grateful and eager to take the positive things I learned from this experience with me. I turned 40 in May and really celebrated life.

It all crashed again

In June, Frida sent money home for a return visit she had missed. She called the surgeon and asked what was going on because she had not received a recall. They didn't send it, so the return visit didn't happen until August. Ten days after the return visit, Frida was at work when the call came. The cancer is back.

It felt incredibly heavy. Realistically, it won't be as quick and painless as last time.

– Everything collapsed again. I cried and ran to my closest classmate and completely broke down. Being told your cancer is back is the last thing you want to be a part of. It felt incredibly heavy. Realistically, it won't be as quick and painless as last time. Now it's going to be a struggle, the hard way.

I realized it right then and there. I didn't get away that easily it seemed.

In the fall of 2023, Frida was treated with radiotherapy and chemotherapy. She was experiencing side effects such as nausea and fatigue. She doesn't know yet what the result was. X-rays are performed only five months after the end of treatment.

– When I got sick the first time, I talked a lot with two colleagues who had cancer. They said “Don't trust forecasts, they are counterproductive and have nothing to do with you.” I took it seriously. Survival statistics don't say anything about me, they just tell me what I looked like before.

Frida's wife Jenny was very supportive as she could talk to her about everything. When Frida first became ill, in the winter of 2022, they chose not to tell the children about her cancer. They said instead that Frida was sick to her stomach and that the doctor was going to operate on her. But when the cancer returned, they read the Cancer Foundation's advice “How to Talk to Kids About Cancer.”

– Now the kids know. It was rather unexciting. Our five-year-old doesn't understand much, but our eight-year-old immediately asked: “Can you die from this disease?” Then you have to tell the truth, that some die but many recover. . I noticed they were meditating. Sometimes, little puffs of worry come out. And when we play games, I always have to start now, because I'm sick.

– Fear of setting goals for the future

Frida does not read about cervical cancer on forums or in groups. She doesn't read her diary either.

Do you think I will recover? – Yes, I think so, he answered.

– I talk to doctors. This is my source, which starts from my body and my seat, and the other is more general and not related to me. That would do me more harm than good. But what I did was I asked the doctor, “Do you think I will recover?” “Yes, I think so,” he replied. And I stick to that.